There are so many mixed emotions swirling around the need for respect and love. People are always looking for both and ending up with one or none. Why is that?
Well, for one thing, love is often given without thought, whereas respect has to be earned. How many times have you heard someone say, “I don’t know why I love so and so because I don’t even like him or her?”
Then there’s the confusion between love and lust. There aren’t a lot of people who can distinguish the difference between the two in the early stages of a relationship. And even after the relationship has had time to mature, it’s still difficult to ascertain the difference between love and sex if you are still having sex with your partner.
But, respect is different. If nothing else, you can feel when someone respects you. You can feel validated by that person. It’s not just hearing pretty words because those pretty words have to be backed up by actions. It’s the actions that tell you whether you’re being respected and you can’t keep telling someone you want their respect; you have to earn it.
If your boundaries are consistently being crossed, you don’t have the respect you’re looking for. All the “I love you’s” in the world won’t diminish the lack of respect you feel when you know that someone keeps taking advantage of you.
When someone keeps undermining you or criticizing you without offering a way to fix the problem, you know that this